Back (that ass up) to school.

Today was the first day of classes at my lovely little Midwest university. I've been ready for awhile. Sort of. I've been ready for the routine late August brings, the renewed sense of purpose, the eagerness on the faces of new students, and the bouquets of newly sharpened pencils.

Nope. No one gave me a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils. Damn. Where is Tom Hanks when you need him the most?

In any case, both my a.m. classes went rather well--students seemed attentive and ready to get the show on the road. My 2:00 section seemed like they would rather be taking naps than doing anything else. I was a little punchy myself. I DID tell them that every time they plagiarize, a tiny woodland fairy dies. "So turn in original work--if not for my sake, for the fairies'. Do it for the fairies!" I begged them. I kind of wanted to gauge how many of them were listening and see how many would roll their eyes or laugh nervously, or look frightened of my apparent mental issues. We'll see how that goes.

Since I have put on so much weight recently (Food is yummy. Exercise is not fun.), I have no decent work clothes. I've traipsed around town this summer in gaucho pants paired with baggy, unflattering t-shirts or too tight, unflattering tank tops. I've been seen in public like this so many times that I'm not even very ashamed anymore, only about 7% shame, and 93% kiss my grits. Luckily, one of my sweet sisters who has lost weight recently and my mom both combed through their wardrobes for skirts and tops to donate to my cause. (The "Friends Don't Let Rachel Wear Gaucho Pants to Work" cause--we don't have a kickstarter or anything, but we DO accept Paypal.)

So here's a little peek at my back to school outfit:

I only added the Wonder Woman button to my lapel after lunch, because I had a chili cheeseburger and slopped it on my white jacket. Necessity is the mother of fashion choices, right? I think that's what they say. I'm pretty sure that's what they say.

Today was also remarkable because I am now in receipt of my new glasses! Yippee! I bought a pair of vintage frames at Brooklyn Flea late this summer and had my prescription put in them. They are darling, if I must say so myself. And even my mother commented that she is glad I got a different pair, because while she liked the purple frames, she's "over them." For reals. My mom said that. "I'm kind of over the purple frames," she said.

In other news, I also learned today that young people do not use Twitter. But they are very aware of the existence of Twitter, and they DO use Twitter-like hash tags in their Facebook status updates from time to time. But some of them report that they are "kind of over it." #I'mtoooldtobehipanyway