Jelly bean tree.

I have an experiment of sorts going on underneath my desk at work. I dropped a jelly bean last year and it rolled under there. I would have picked it up, but I was hugely pregnant at the time and figured that if I crawled under my desk I'd probably get stuck and nothing short of the jaws of life would be able to pry me out of there, and some firefighter would have to heft me back onto my feet. So I left it there and forgot about it.
The next semester (fall 07) I came back and noticed the jelly bean was still there. I thought about picking it up then, but then I thought, wait...let's just leave it there and see how long it takes custodial services to find it and sweep it up.
(I got a new officemate, and she was worried that if she left papers in a stack on the floor they would get recycled while she was gone, but I was able to assure her that if my spring 07 jelly bean was still there, I was pretty sure her papers would still be there the next day.)
Anywho, uponst checking under my desk this morning, I see my dusty little jelly bean lying right there where I left it. And I was just thinking, that if I leave it there long enough, perhaps, with the right climate and a little love, just maybe it will sprout into a jelly bean tree.
I've never seen a jelly bean tree, but I imagine it would look a lot like a ficus. And it would have margarita-flavored jelly bean fruit growing in plump little clusters.
I voiced this deep-seated wish to my new officemate, and she said she'd see if she could arrange it. And if anyone can get that jelly bean tree to sprout, it will be her.
I warned her that if I come into the office one day and see a ficus-looking tree growing out from my desk sporting margarita-flavored jelly bean fruit, I might die of happiness. Then she said she wouldn't do it if it would lead to my death, so I assured her that I wouldn't die after all. I'd just collapse in the floor and pee my pants. But then, as we know, we'd both have to work with a stinking pee spot in the floor because custodial services apparently does not clean our offices, as evidenced by the original jelly bean.
So it's circular, you see.
And it's nice to have an officemate who responds to my insane digressions as though they're just another part of normal conversation between colleagues.


Anonymous said...

You make me laugh so hard! Anytime I need a break I just look you up!

Elecia said...

I really liked your jelly bean story and thought I might share mine with you. Before I moved in with my husband, i decided to take up the mountainous task of cleaning his daughters' room. It was a very large room that was full to the brim of toys, trash, and who knows what, with a small path cleared to their bed. As I was digging through the mess, I discovered a bookcase. When I removed some of the books from said bookcase, I saw a jelly bean. It clearly had been there for some time, by the layer of dust on it, I would guess at least a couple years. I decided to sprayed the bookcase and the jellybean with a good coat of pledge before I wiped it off, however, before I could swipe the cloth, my youngest stepdaughter saw it. "Ooh! a jellybean", she exclaimed, and started to pop it in her mouth. Luckily, I caught her arm about a millimeter before the jelly bean entered her mouth. She was a little mad that I wouldn't let her eat it, even when she new it had pledge on it.(but then you have to know my step-daughter to understand)
So, let this be a lesson, you may want to remove the jellybean before you ever let Eliot crawl around in your office. Assuming he will at some point crawl, since I hear that you are hindering his ability to learn to walk!