The case of the missing grill.

The Lego dump truck was almost complete, when, alas, we discovered one of the grill pieces had gone missing.
Exhibit A:

As everyone knows, a dump truck with half a grill is almost worse than no dump truck at all.

Eliot quickly determined that we should call and report this mystery to the police:
"I'll be the police guy, Mom. You make the report."

Eliot: "Okay. Now where were you last playing with the truck?"

Me: "Ummm...let's see...I think...I had it right down there on the floor, but I don't see it anywhere down there."

Eliot: "Uh-oh, this is bad. I better call in the fire trucks. And do we have any gum because police guys always have gum."

Me: "So we're going to launch a massive search for the grill piece?"

Eliot: "Yes. And can you call Plablo from the Yardigans and tell him to come and call the airport guys?"

Me: "Dude, if I do that, this place will be crawling with authorities."

Eliot: "That's right, baby. We gotta find that piece."

*****

This kid cracks me up. Seriously, I could not make this stuff up.
I'm looking forward to another year of hijinks and wild imagination. :)

Lists upon lists.

I love making lists. I rarely end up checking everything off of a list. In fact, I can go to Walmart with a list in hand and still manage to come home without items that were on the list. More often, I pull into the parking lot only to realize I have left my list at home.

But I still enjoy lists.

This is the time of year for putting together 2011's uberlist. In order not to lose it, I'm giving listography.com a go. While I'm at it, I thought I'd keep track of films I see and books I read in 2011. Just for fun.

I'm sure I'll think of more and more lists as the year progresses.

You can follow me at http://www.listography.com/stop_drop_roll
and/or keep track of your very own lists there.

See you in the New Year...

Unfinished.

I still have days where I'm completely convinced that I'm going to accomplish something grand.

Today will be the day that I finish all these little projects that I have started and am in the middle of. December Daily album: no sweat. Embroidered gifts that I didn't finish in time for Christmas: today's the day! Organize and clean: watch out, duplex, you're not going to know what hit you! I generally have all these illusions of grandeur while I'm lying in bed the night before, my brain humming with the excitement of potential productivity.

Nevermind what history tells us! Nevermind that I have had lofty intentions for almost every single day of the year, and yet have managed not to follow a single project through to completion. Seriously, I can't even commit to washing an entire sink full of dishes before I get bored or distracted and leave off to wander about, wasting time away on piddly, nonessential tasks. Or, I've been known to collapse onto the couch and fall asleep, no matter what time of day it is. 9:30 in the morning? Oh, I'm so sleepy! 11:00? I'll just rest here a moment before lunch. And then suddenly lunch is supper and supper is bedtime and I have done absolutely nothing all day long. I am excellent at doing nothing. I excel at wasting time. It's a talent.

Anyway, to make myself feel better about not having accomplished a single thing today, here is a glimpse of a few projects I'm currently (not) working on:

December Daily album cover
(kit from belladrummer)

Day 1 (postcard from belle and boo)

more Day 1

Day 2

more Day 2

Day 4

Day 6

 I'm only up to Day 10 so far on my December album. I swear I'm going to finish it before December ends. Maybe. It could happen.

Here is something that is finished:

fun cross stitch (pattern by andwabisabi)

I know what you're thinking: "My, you certainly have one of the loveliest left thumbs I've ever seen."
Thank you.

I also finished a Christmas gift for Steven. And yes, those are Nerf gun bullets in the dish beside the Godzilla cross stitch. That's a sentence that may never before have been constructed in the entire history of the English language.

pattern by bombastitch

Here is one of my uncompleted stitching projects. I'm embroidering this princess and the pea onto a tote bag for my niece. It was supposed to be a Christmas gift. Oops.

pattern by kloin

And here is one of the reasons I haven't been able to finish any of my ongoing projects lately:

Everytime I try to sit and work on something, this knucklehead climbs up onto my neck and demands a ride. Here he's saying, "Look, Mom! I'm making horns!" I knew it! Devil child!

Nah. Actually, he's pretty amazing. I can't complain. He's my best unfinished work, after all.

Eliot, here and now.

I delight in hearing my son use new words, grown-up words like "exhaust" and "privacy." He's such a curious little fellow. Every time he hears me say something that he doesn't understand, he asks what I mean. He's always listening and always asking questions. Often I hear him use words that I don't remember teaching him, words that he must have learned through context or repetition. Those are sometimes the funniest moments, when he pipes up with something completely unexpected.

"Mom," he'll say, with a big sigh, "This is terrible. I can't find my cement mixer."

or

"Yuck. Something smells. I think it's that truck's exhaust."

"I have to pee, and I'm going to need some privacy."

building a "cave"

watching Blue's Clues and trying to pretend he doesn't see Mommy taking a picture

 He has also decided recently that in addition to being a farmer when he grows up, he's going to be a "police guy." He's threatened to jail Steven and I for such infractions as winning too many games of Spiderman Uno in a row. This evening, when a stranger commented on his dancing in the coffee shop, he whispered to me, "Mom, when I get bigger, I'm putting her in jail."

enthralled with Little Big Planet on the PS3

At the present moment, we're also very concerned about Santa and his lists. I may have threatened him a time or two with the possibility of receiving nothing but reindeer poop in his stocking, and so now he's convinced that Santa is watching his every move and keeping score. A few days ago, he said, "Mommy, you're beautiful!" I smiled and said, "Thanks, sweetie. That's such a nice thing to say." And with a sly grin, he replied, "I know. Do you think Santa heard me?" When he picked a piece of dropped cereal off the kitchen floor and threw it away (after being asked by Steven to do so), he rubbed his hands together and said, "Well, now I'm definitely on the nice list!"

stirring his "coffee" (water) just like Mommy does

Here in the midst of the seasonal chaos, the first emotional year of being divorced and feeling like I'm playing tug of war with my ex, using Eliot as the rope, I'm just trying to focus as often as possible on the daily miracle of having this wonderful little boy in my life. As difficult as it can be at times, every moment spent with Eliot is worth it. Every new word he utters, every new game that captivates him, all the rascal-y-ness he brings into my life...I know I'm a better, stronger person for being this munchkin's momma. Definitely. Indubitably. Without a doubt.

My son is every bit as weird as his mother.

Mommy: "What do you want for breakfast, Boo?"
Eliot: "Ummm...I'll have lemonade and a salad."
Mommy: "?!"